Tactics Book Five, Chapter Three "The Wisteria Diary - Or, The Night in which the Oni-kui Tengu Regains His Past: On The Origins of the Laws Governing The Human World - Book Two" by Higashiyama Kazuko and Kinoshita Sakura translation by Sanada (www.hana-mi.net) 122 no text 123 Text: The Wisteria Diary - Or, The Night in which the Oni-kui Tengu Regains His Past Text: On The Origins of the Laws Governing The Human World - Book Two 124 no text 125 Haruka: ...Answer me. Ayame: Ah... ugh... Haruka: Dou you want to die like this!? Ayame: ...I... I... Kantarou: [rin-pyou-tou-sha-kai-jin-retsu-zai-zen] (The generic magical chant used by onmyouji and ninja. They can constitute a protective/exorcism charm themselves or can be used as a focusing excercise before another attack.) SFX: *jingle* 126 SFX: *whoosh* Haruka: What's the meaning of this!? Kantarou: Listen to me, Haruka. Kantarou: That girl is Ayame-san - she's a member of Hasumi's research group. We've never met her before. Haruka: "Ayame?" 127 Haruka: ...... Haruka: "Ayame..." Haruka: Kantarou. Haruka: Rosalie and Youko are here too. If everything is all settled now, I'll bring them in. Kantarou: Sure, that's fine. Haruka: Sorry about that. Haruka: That was violent... Haruka: I guess I was a little too rough. Ayame: You acted like we had met before! 128 Haruka: No, I've never seen you before in my life. Ayame: What...?! Kantarou: Haruka!! Kantarou: Wait! That was so... Ayame: Just let him go! Ayame: I don't know why he would feel compelled to say something like that to someone he just met... 129 Ayame: SENSEI! I want a word with you!! SFX: *steaming with anger* Kantarou: Uwaah, looks like I'm left to take the fall... 130 Haruka: I must be stupid... Text on Haruka: "Self-Hatred" Haruka: What the hell was I doing?! Damn it... Youko: Give it a rest, Haruka-chan! Youko: You're just beating youself up over this. It's okay! SFX: *bird flying by* Youko: Wh... what is it, Rosalie-chan? Rosalie: Why should you care? It has nothing to do with you. Youko: Huh... I guess it's because we're all kind of like a family. Youko: Ah, but Hasumi-san must be worrying just like me right now. Rosalie: ......Ryoukan? Youko: Come on... 131 Youko: I know when you've had a really angry arguement with someone, it seems totally impossible to get over it. Youko: But I think there's absolutely nothing that friends and family can't overcome. Rosalie: I guess... I did get too angry with him... Youko: ! Youko: That's better! Youko: I'm sure Hasumi-san is really worried! 132 Ayame: About that, uh, toilet youkai... Ayame: That wasn't a Kanbari Nyuudou, right? (This is a very mean-spirited youkai that take the form of a bald man who lurks in the bathroom. It makes noises like a cuckoo bird and generally bothers people. But, it usually won't bother you if you untie your kimono or take off your pants. When you can't open the door to the toilet, even though there's no one inside, you can also blame this youkai. A similar spirit was worshipped as a god in China.) Kantarou: She doesn't seem too angry about Haruka... Ayame: No, it didn't really seem like one of those... Ayame: Maybe it was a Bakemonokou, then? (Bakemonokou is actually a kind of medicinal ointment, but it comes from a story in which a badger youkai was hiding in the toilet so it could touch women's butts when they undressed. Badger youkai (tanuki) are known to be perverted. When a samurai retainer of the household attacked the tanuki and cuts off its arm, the youkai promised to teach them how to make the secret medicine if it could have its arm back.) Kantarou: But I don't think a Bakemonokou-kun is a particularly strong youkai... it could be a Kanbari Nyuudou, I guess, but why won't he come out...? Ayame: So the toilet youkai is a Kanbari Nyuudou, then!? Ayame: There's an superstition that if you say "Kanbari Nyuudou Cuckoo" on New Year's eve, you won't have any problems with them for a year. (It's true! Say "kanbari nyuudou hototogisu" on New Year's Eve and you'll have one less youkai in your house! *laugh*) Kantarou: Wow, you know a lot, Ayame-chan! Ayame: But there's one thing that still confuses me - what does a cuckoo bird have to do with a youkai, Ichinomiya-sensei? 133 Kantarou: Well, the simple explanation is that because of the cuckoo's nesting habits and the sad cry that comes from its red-colored mouth, it's said to be unclean, and therefore associated with things like toilets. (The things you learn from Tactics... o__o I heard that because the cuckoo sings a very sad song at night, it's said to be the voice of a ghost crying for her family. The Cuckoo-Woman is sometimes seen in art as a very sad ghost. But there's also the story that cuckoos abandon their eggs in the nests of other birds, and then the young cuckoo hatches and kills all of the other birds in the nest, which would certainly make it unclean. But as Kantarou will explain, there is another level of association.) Kantarou handwritten text: [And it's common supersition that if you hear a bird sing while in the toilet, you'll have bad luck. And they say that the cuckoo can travel freely between the world of the living and the world of the dead.] Kantarou: And then there's the Chinese god of the toilet, Kakutou. (This is the Japanese reading of the Chinese name Zi Gu Shen, or Tsu Ku as it's written in on-yomi) Now the funny thing is that Kantarou says the Kanbari Nyuudou (ugly old bald man youkai) is associated with Zi Gu, but Zi Gu is a FEMALE god! A very beautiful one, in fact. Zi Gu was the mistress of some government official, but the guy's was so jealous of Zi Gu's beauty and grace that she killed Zi Gu while she was in the bathroom. So Zi Gu's ghost haunted the official's toilet, making lots of noise and generally frightening visitors. It got so bad that the Empress had to grant Zi Gu's ghost official goddess status so she would go to heaven. No joke - Zi Gu is the goddess of those really deep thoughts you get while sitting on the toilet, and is venerated by writers and psychics and philosophers and other people who do a lot of thinking. But watch out if you spend a lot of time in there - Zi Gu is one of the most common spirits to be possessed by!) Ayame: Kakutou? Kantarou: Well, long ago they started using the word "hototogisu" for "cuckoo" in poetry, but the original word is "kakkou." Right Text: "kakkou" (name of bird) Left Text: "Kakutou" (name of god) Ayame: So the kanji looked so similar that people got them mixed up? Kantarou: Exactly!! Kantarou: So a long time ago, the Kanbari Nyuudou story and the cuckoo story were linked. Kantarou: The origins of these old superstitions are really interesting! Ayame: You're right! And you make it sound so easy! Kantarou: Ooh, Ayame-chan? Ayame: Yes? 134 Kantarou: By any chance do you take off all of your clothes in the toilet? SFX: *yay!* Ayame: NO WAY!! Kantarou: When I was little, I just couldn't do it unless I was naked! It was frustrating! SFX: *grunt* SFX: *moaning* Kantarou: But if I was naked, there was no problem! Kantarou: I'd always make sure to cough before going into the toilet to do my business, too. Kantarou: That was to let the spirits of the bathroom know I was coming, so they would come out. That's what I believed. Kantarou: Legend has it that Izanami no Mikoto created the gods Haniyasuhime no Kami and Mizuhanome no Kami from her feces and urine. (Izanami is the Shinto creator goddess, who died giving birth to the god of fire, Kagutsuchi no Kami. As she burned to death, her husband, Izanagi no Mikoto, transformed feces and urine and vomit and everything else into gods.) Kantarou: In esoteric Buddhism, this is also the birth of Ususama Vidya-raja, the god of fire. Kantarou: So even though we think of the toilet as a smelly, unclean place, there are some people who think it should be made sacred as the birthplace of gods. 135 Kantarou: A fearful heart creates a monster, while a faithful heart creates a god. Kantarou: But which is Rosalie-chan's youkai friend? Kantarou: And of course, whatever it is, it's still Rosalie-chan's friend. Ayame: ...... Ayame: Ichinomiya-sensei... if I may say one thing... Ayame: About the Kanbari Nyuudou... SFX: *chair hitting Kantarou* Kantarou: KYAAA!! 136 Rosalie: Ryoukan!! SFX: *running* Ayame: Oooh, Rosa-chan, welcome home! Kantarou: Oh, the innocence of children... Kantarou: Ah, Haruka and Youko-chan! Which of you should I thank for bringing Rosalie-chan home? Youko: It was no problem! Haruka: Oh yeah, Youko had something to say. Youko: Don't worry too much! Youko: I mean, how mad can Hasumi-san get? Haruka: ..... Incantation: Om bishibishi karakara shibari sowaka ("Inescapably Bind Up" - sounds better in Japanese/Sanskrit, hehe) 137 Haruka: We weren't ready... again... Youko: I can't move!! 138 Kantarou: That was Fudou Kanashibari... (A binding spell used in many anime, XD) Kantarou: A magic user must have broken into the house... Kantarou: No... SFX: *scrubbing* Hasumi: So is this the work of some youkai? You're too old for this silliness, Ichinomiya... Hasumi: Ever since I put the toilet in the unlucky "demon gate" corner of the house... Hasumi: It's really been a problem... Hasumi: It's been spewing dirty water and such... Hasumi: But the demon gate is superstition!! SFX: *scrubbing* SFX: *damn it!!* 139 SFX: *passing by quickly* Hasumi: !! Hasumi: Rosalie!! SFX: *fall* Hasumi: Rosalie, you could at least say a proper hello!! SFX: *banging on door* Hasumi: Unlock that door, Rosalie!! SFX: *breathing hard* SFX: *big impact* 140 Edwards: Ah, there you are. SFX: *snap* Edwards: I've finally found you... Edwards (in English): Now, let's both go home... Edwards (in English): My dear automatisme. (I think that's french for robot or automaton) 141 Rosalie: ....Ah... 142 SFX: *grab* Hasumi: Rosalie... Hasumi: Don't touch Rosalie... Hasumi: Since we first met, I've had a bad feeling about you... Hasumi: How do you know Rosalie!? SFX: *grip* Edwards: I know a lot of things... this is my... SFX: *swing* Fox: D...d...don't bother Rosalie! Fox: I won't forgive you! SFX: *choking laughter* 143 Edwards: AHAHAHAHAHAHA!! SFX: Gaaaaah!! Hasumi: What's so funny!? SFX: *grab* Edwards: This pathetic, hypocritical little farce amuses me. Edwards: I really ought to thank you. SFX: *punch* Rosalie: Ryoukan! Rosalie: Ryoukan!! 144 no text 145 Edwards: Oh my... SFX: *spewing water* SFX: *splash* Edwards: Ugh! Edwards: Ah! Edwards: Wah! Edwards: Ah! SFX: *fwoom* SFX: *drip* 146 SFX: *bubble* Rosalie: Kyaa!! SFX: *grab* 147 Kantarou: I finally found you, Kanbari Nyuudou! Kantarou: I know you're really shy~ *heart* Edwards: I'm leaving... 148 Haruka: It didn't take us long to break free. Haruka: Your binding spell was too loose. Haruka: People like Kantarou or myself could escape easily. Kantarou: Fudou Kanashibari is a very powerful binding spell, but there aren't many people who know that it's also a basic technique of Shugendou. (Shugendou is an ascetic religious practice that combines Shinto and Buddhism.) Kantarou: You're only here as a guest of the government. Kantarou: So of course you wouldn't know that. 149 Kantarou: Minamoto Raikou... Kantarou: He taught you how to do Fudou Kaneshibai, didn't he? Kantarou: In fact, I think he's the one who arranged for you to come here in the first place. But what business could you possibly have here... as a you're a poor imitation of an exorcist. Edwards: Fufufu, Japanese magic is quite difficult... Edwards: Well, I was only practicing it to entertain myself. Haruka: ! SFX: *surprise* SFX: *shove* Haruka: Gah... 150 SFX: *dramatic face-off sound* SFX: *surprise* Edwards: My specialty is actually hand-to-hand combat! Haruka: Oh really... SFX: *slam* 151 SFX: *generic fighting noises* SFX: *flick* Haruka: You're better than I thought... Edwards: Is that so? Haruka: Damn it, this isn't fair!! Edwards: Fighting requires skill and strategy! SFX: *impact* Edwards: Wah! Kantarou: ! Kantarou: Oh no!! 152 Kantarou: Kanbari Nyuudou - RUN!! Edwards: Almost like a military commander, you are the guardian of this gate. SFX: *whoosh* Edwards: And when it opens, may it take care of that annoying man! Rosalie: N... 153 Rosalie: NOOOOOOOOO!! SFX: *dramatic sound effect* 154 SFX: *falling* Kantarou: As I thought... that Kanbari Nyuudou was a god guarding the gate in that toilet... Kantarou: And now the seal on the demon gate is broken!! 155 Haruka: This little pipsqueaks are going to finish me off? Kantarou: Wah! SFX: *fry* Haruka: The guy who owns this house is a real idiot... SFX: *explosion* Kantarou: HARUKA!! Haruka: *spit* 156 Haruka: That's the grin of someone who seized a perfect opportunity... I could have been knocked out for a while.. Haruka: You're not human... Edwards: Oh no, right now I'm one hundred percent human. Edwards: But this has been fun. Edwards: I nearly forgot that I had promised to save the real fun for my master... Edwards: That's you, the strongest youkai. 157 Haruka: Bastard... Oni: *squeaky noises* Hasumi: Wh... what's wrong? You look angry... Hasumi: And this feeling... 158 Kantarou: What a pain in the ass!! Kantarou: This time... SFX: *breathing hard* Kantarou: They've gone too far...